Karma payment plan - Blog

and so it is...

Mon, 24 May 2010 13:47:40 -0800

Picture taken in a tent city filled with needs- no fresh water no sanitation and while there was a health clinic in the area the health clinic did not see children
People ask me all the time “how is rebuilding in Haiti going?” I cant help but snicker. Rebuilding? Are you serious? They still have to clean up first. While the efforts of many have been in the process, still very little has been truly accomplished (not to down play the amazing work so many people and organizations have done) and it is a long way till rebuilding takes place. If you ride on the main roads and stop at the upscale places, yes it appears things are better. But for the 100,000s of people still living in unthinkable conditions, it is a nightmare with no end. People also often ask me what does Haiti need. My answer collaboration and long term planning. While there is a continual need for volunteers to come help, long term development is essential. Long term planning that is culturally competent, thoroughly thought threw (with out putting up to much red tape which can slow down needed services), and collaborated. everyone holds a little piece of the solution but it is nothing if you don’t put them together. there is also no need to reinvent the wheel. while supplies are needed, it needs to be the right supplies and the right quantity. Its more work to organize threw the crap one has then you could believe. Hospitals have a lot of supplies here but not the right supplies. I have a needs list from about six hospitals, the lists are all very similar. Most important we need people not to forget that the need is so great. Often I speak with people who have just come down here and their response “I had no idea, the media shows little” well im here and im all over and ill tell you there is a huge need!! There is a lot of need for long term commitments here.

Ive seen a lot of people doing assessments, it is easy for even myself to point out needs and flaws. But what is need is for people to act.

Personally it is still a very hard decision to go home, for myself I know it is needed at least for a while. Please continue to act. I feel like im calling the kettle black, saying what is needed and then turning away instead of continuing. Hypocritical, I know. i can not hold others accountable only myself.

the heart does not feel what the eye does not see

Thu, 20 May 2010 18:02:54 -0800

"the heart does not feel what the eye does not see" Haitian proverb

Im writing this right now from la plaza, for those who don't know, it is a very nice hotel right by the Palace in PAP, which after almost a month of intense working when i first arrived was an oasis away from the chaos and pain.

im sitting here soaking wet after getting caught in the rain while unloading much needed supplies to a hospital and escorting a very sick and fragile TB patient back from the bath room to his tent-

i just spent the last 2 weeks in milot. I chaperoned 9 new nurses on their volunteer trip to work with earthquake victims in haiti. they were amazing! i cant even describe how great they were with the patients, how flexible and how knowledgeable. the hospital was also amazing the quality of care they provided for the patients excellent. It gave me hope

unfortunately the nurses plane ride out of cape haitian was cancelled but luckily they were flexible so we went to PAP for a connecting flight back to the states. I landed in PAP and sat down waiting for my ride. a rarity it was over cast and not to hot. the wind reminded me of an early fall day. an epiphany hit me and i realized it was time for me to go home. i miss my family i miss my friends. i miss doing things that i enjoy. not that i dont enjoy helping people here but the long hours and hard work are wearing on me. i miss windsurfing and pottery and real showers, cold milk, bike rides fresh air.. the list could go on, but mostly i miss my family.

i have been volunteering now for 4 months in haiti. i have seen so much.. i cant even begin to describe. getting here right after the eartquake and watching the transition for the last 4 months has been both frustrating and amazing. The people here are strong in spirit and even against the odds and with limited resources are still surviving, and will survive. the organization and collaboration of many organizations disgusting,(not by all) while the strength of some really amazing individuals inspiring.

so im heading home May 28th. there is still so much need here the people are still mostly in tent cities without tents, sanitation is non existent and care is limited.. knowing this makes it hard to leave. the locals i have become close with who great my on my return from Milot with smiles and thanks, also make it incredibly hard to leave. a part of me feels like im abandoning them. and in a way i am. but i will be more effective in helping people were ever i am if i do have rest if i acquire more resources and more education.

so thank you everyone for your support, and thank you all of those that will continue assisting down here...

drop offs

Wed, 28 Apr 2010 07:23:21 -0800

currently dropping off supplies to orphanages. (see picture to left) there are so many new orphanages new orphanes and a big need for them to have supplies. currently also allocating medical supplies to hospitals- medical supplies they need not stuff like breast implants that for some reason made their way down here! also emergency transport of patients. i do a very bad job at blogging but please check out these blogs of people i have worked with on the ground to get a better idea of what i do.

http://cory-trulymadlydeeply.blogspot.com/

http://sebringphotography.wordpress.com/

http://sebringphotography.wordpress.com/

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the frustrations and triumphs

Sat, 24 Apr 2010 11:49:15 -0800

I cant explain it. I cant comprehend it. The first time really debriefing. Sitting around diner talking about what we are doing, about what we have done. A second to think, diner with a lot of the people who have a special place in my heart connected to all of the roles I have played in Haiti. I feel strange talking about that first week after the earth quake, watching videos and looking at pictures of what was the chaos then and what is the chaos now. Trying to imagine what it was like back then. how we speak casually of how traumatic things were. The question asked “how can we ever return to normalcy?” then thinking about my local Haitians friends. what it must have been like for them what it is still like for them.

Seeing everything the transition from right after the earth quack to now. Things that went well things that deteriated. How can you leave . still working the 20 hour shifts I used to but much different frustrations. Realizing how much I miss my family how much I have seen and wondering how much this has changed me. I can never go back to what I was before. But I have learned alot

The father who’s son was transferred by the French out of the country the desperation surrounding him as I walked threw the airport field of countries looking for the French flag only to be disappointed more despair.

The children I have seen die, the families pain. The lack of organization, the lack of planning the lack of real services. Walking into a tent city carrying patient out on a bed, rain, starvation. Kid being beat by the police. Craniotomy done in the room. The dead gentleman not revived from the CPR lying next to the new mother placenta on table….. but then the patient we transferred, the one that they thought would die, responding to verbal command, young boy a glimmer of hope. Dropping of the supplies immediately needed. Collaborating with groups that have similar goals. Working hard to make a difference. Getting the patient the care they need.

Help is still needed there are still tent cities with no tents, there are still hungry people and piles of rubble, and people dying… help

Haiti

Fri, 09 Apr 2010 05:19:58 -0800

at the airport in Miami heading back to Haiti. home for a little over a week, the time flew by. while i did not get to do the top 3 things on my list of things to do i did get to see a lot of my friends and family, i got to work on the HIV van, do my taxes, eat fresh food, fix my computer and enjoy spring weather.

I want to say thank you again to all those that have been so supportive especially my family. You are in my heart and thoughts all the time. It has been hard to switch my mind away from haiti for such a short period, so while i might have been a little pre occupied on my trip home know that i love all of you, and im taking care of myself. please feel free to continue to watch my progress via facebook or check out globaldirt.org

A little break

Fri, 02 Apr 2010 07:00:21 -0800

Haiti still needs your help- i cant even begin to describe the conditions on the ground but i will try- Hospitals need help, tent cities need help, orphanages need help, everyone is still in need of help. while meetings are important there is a need for action now! CDTI a big hospital in PAP just closed, Medishare has shut their doors to new patients (for good reason) but the fact is people need medical attention now and the amount of places to receive them is dwindling. Basic human needs are not being met. However there are organizations doing good work, please continue to support those on the ground doing work, the need is now, lets work to get food out, lets work on getting them shelter- all of this are things my group works on now. We see the difference we make everyday but Haiti needs more coordination, organization and movement.

The saying "be the change you want to see.." is very relevant.

hello

Tue, 09 Mar 2010 07:59:27 -0800

hey everyone, i have been very busy hence no time to blog well, but i did want everyone to know i am doing well. working very hard with Global D.I.R.T to get a lot of great things done. delivering food and supplies, assisting hospitals, helping escort orphans back to miami, every day is different.. please don't forget about haiti the need here is still and will be for years great.. well got to run

Being sentimental before Haiti trip #2

Mon, 22 Feb 2010 23:19:32 -0800

Currently I’m sitting at the Fort Lauderdale airport, my flight schedule has slightly changed, tomorrow morning at 6:00 I will be on a plane to the DR. flight #715 Fort Lauderdale/Miami to Santo Domingo DR. From there I will take a bus to PAP Haiti.

I have a second to sit and relax and time to reflect on some thing that I have seen and done, or at least the opportunity to graze their surface. I feel like I have lived 4 life times in the last 6 months.

Going back to Haiti feels somewhat surreal to me. I already suspect it is going to be worst then I imagine it and it’s hard to explain what that type of devastation feels and looks like. My heartaches for all those affected by this devastation. My heartaches for the pain and suffering these people have had to endure even before the earthquake. I have been asked how do I deal with what I see; the hopelessness of not being able to help all those that ask me for it, the death, the morning, the destruction. I cant even remember everyone who I saw die, there was just to many. I guess for me I don’t focus on the “failed” cases, the deceased, or the people who I had no other choice but to walk by when their need was so great. I focus on the people who I was able to help. Especially that first week were the death and wounded was incomprehensible, and hard choices had to be made.

I started my day today by walking in the arboretum (if your ever in Boston you should go there it is amazing) The sun just coming up, the air chilled with promises of a spring day. One of my favorite types of weather. I wont lie it is hard for me to leave this comfort and beauty, its hard for me to leave my family and friends, but I know I need to go down there now. Many people have expressed concern to me about me going back down after so short a break. And the best reason I can give you is, my heart tells me that’s were I should be. The hardest issues I have had to deal with in my life are situations were I knew I should act but I didn’t for one reason or another. Because of this I have vowed to myself that when I know I am meant to do something for now on I will do it even if the path is difficult. I have been blessed with the opportunity to go down and help, and I feel at peace within because I know it’s the right thing for me to do. I have been blessed with great family and friends. Thank you everyone for understanding, especially my family who have supported me time and time again and who are always in my thoughts.

I know I have been very busy these last couple months and not always the easiest to reach and not always able to express how thankful I am to everyone in my life, but I do want everyone to know that your love and support have meant so much to me. Mentally knowing that I have such amazing people behind me has been very empowering. Financially, there is no way I could have possibly done this without donations both monitor and of supplies. Thank you so much!

My deepest gratitude goes out to everyone, especially the great staff on the mobile health van I work on in Boston, HIV innovations/project health moves, were I also learned many of the skills necessary to do the work I do. The work you guys do and the dedication you have to patients rights and autonomy is empowering, not only to your clients, but to me as well J Your support has allowed me to continue to work else were and I’m so happy that there is such a great team caring for some of the most vulnerable populations here in the states. The staff at New England Baptist Hospital, especially my manager Marybeth for her continued support and flexibility. The Northeastern University community for not only giving me such a great education but for supporting me now as an alumni. A special thanks to Jim and Karen as well, you are my mentors, my friends and my family. You guys have helped me time and time again and I am deeply inspired by your positive and caring outlook on life and towards humanity.

Again my family, especially my brother and his fiancé, and my sister, who have supported me relentlessly, letting me stay at your house, watching my cat, receiving my mail, talking to me endlessly about my interests and being involved with my life; attending my art shows, driving me to go windsurfing, attending talks I’ve given, and being involved positively in all aspects of my life. The list of things I am appreciated of could go on forever. I’m not sure if I have properly expressed how appreciative I am of all the things you do for me. You guys are the best! And of course my mom, my inspiration, my hero. To all the rest of my family as well, for your support and love. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Last but not least thank you to all of the great people I worked side by side with in PAP, the first month I was there. You guys are amazing and I don’t know if I would have made it through that first trip with out all of your support. The great nurses and doctors, EMTs, the military, the locals that even in face of such personal tragedy selflessly volunteered to help, and showed me such kindness and strength. All of you, and then some, truly are amazing people doing amazing things.

My plan is to head to PAP tomorrow via bus and work there with global D.I.R.T; the best way to reach me is by facebook or email. I can also be reached at 509 376 36 454, or who ever has that phone should be able to give you an update on me. A lot of what happens in Haiti right now is on a day to day bases so I cant give you a detailed itinerary of my trip, but do know that while my main reason for going down there is to help the people of Haiti. My main concern is still number one, me. So I will take every precaution I can to remain safe, while still delivering care to those who so desperately need it right now.

Please don’t forget about Haiti, don’t forget about any of the vulnerable people in this world, and try to do what ever you can to help humanity.

Thank you, and see you when i get back in about a month.

back

Wed, 17 Feb 2010 22:24:59 -0800

there is so many emotions and thoughts running threw my head, and it is to late in the night to try to wright them all down. one thing i do know is I need to return to Haiti. i have taken a couple days to collect myself but now my heart strings are pulling me back, so monday i will be returning.

how to say goodbye

Mon, 08 Feb 2010 13:03:07 -0800

My soul feels rejuvenated today, and once again I feel like I could do this for ever. I come home from working at CDTI and I have one of those meaning full talks with someone that you know you will remember forever. A sunny day I walked back to the hotel I am now staying at (what luxury, thank you!) with a local friend. You see a lifetime of need in a 6-block walk, but now unlike when I started there are now street venders, were once there were only the dead and ruble. I am in awe of the human resilience, of the spirit and of the power of community.

Its getting closer every minute to when I said I would leave and every second closer its getting harder and harder to say good bye. The hospital im at now needs crutches and I know were to get them it will just take me time, im running out of time though. I started working at the CDTI (which is different then university hospital, someone really needs to get an NGO in here to connect and organize all the NGOs) there I have run into one of the Canadian teams I worked with at UM/medishare, and one of the best nurses I have ever worked with in Boston. There is much hugging and hellos. I pick up sandwiches on the street corner and run into the Haitian doctor I worked with the other day. She stops her car and tells me about one of the patients I worked closely with her on at the community hospital. The young patient is doing well but needs to get her medicine or she might lose her eye. It breaks my heart a little for its one more place and one more thing I wont is able to follow up on. I will try to stay true to my word though and try to get out on a military flight wed. I’m working the over night shift tonight as pretty much the only nurse, other nights there was no one rto watch the patients. I am no longer in charge of a million things and focus my energy on direct patient care, I love it. But sadly I think it needs to be my last night and day of work. Well I will try to sleep now for a couple hours.